The Year That Was

Hmmm.. here comes another "end of the year" blog. Well, i dont care, its my blog and you can't do anything about it.(hahaha)
I just like to reminisce and share the things that had happened to me.
2008, i consider would be the best and unique year of my life...Many unexpected things happened. Twist and turn and mazes and such..hahaha
All in all, it was a fun and blessed year.

Let's start off at
January:
the month i turned (hmmm.. we palan) 21..

Legal age.woohoo hahaha Big Deal. It's the Philippines, who ever heard of "only 21 and up"..hahaha


3 months before my college life ends. Everyone was rushing and excited.
And oh yeah, mom turned 49. (hehe) She had so many birthday cakes as usual. from every bakeshop in town courtesy of the Med Companies.hehe

February:
Valentines Day was almost perfect. Singles were livin' it.hehe

My bes and I decided to eat out instead.hehe (hmp, i miss her)
This month sucked as it made quite a scare on the whole family.
Mom had TIA (Transient Ischemic Attack). and it almost effed up the entire year for me.
Man, i was so worried and down that time that you wouldnt even recognize that it was me.
At this time, i had some arguments and misunderstanding with some close friends, yeah, it wasn't really a good month.
Fortunately, mom recovered and she's now noisy and healthy again. :)


March:
25 days before graduation, i recieved the news that i had to decide whether to attend my graduation ceremonies or fly with my aunt and her family to the states. Given that my family has a tendency to be hysterical, i chose the latter.
I broke out the news to my friends, my crew, and my peeps..
We had the best despidida for me at least.. Basketball, Swimming and Foods, it couldnt have been any better...hahaha





March 21st; im off to LA..

I had mixed feelings.. I was happy I get to experience what most of my colleagues aimed to do, yet i was sad coz i'd be missing out on my college graduation and senior's night.
I tried to keep myself preoccupied in Cali.. going to places, visiting the scenes and enjoy every experience a new to me.



March 30; I couldnt forget this day. I was missing my friends. Seeing their pics on the net at the seniors night a couple of nights before, almost crushed my heart.
I spent my Graduation at Disneyland instead.



April:
Fun times: Off to Indiana and chicago. Picture picture.. Gorging on foods. Sky's the limit.
We went to relatives and friends..




Last week of April. New Jersey time. More picture picture.
and the 24oz steak FTW!!!


May:
Sent back to LA, to test the water they say..
Stayed in Carson at my cousin and his family.
My nephew and nieces are such rascals but they're sweet.
I miss them calling me, "tito kit kit"
I miss them...




June:
I realized that i was officially unemployed. It sucked.hahaha
So i started to look for work. Found a part time job that payed decent.

Them folks I worked for were nice. God Bless them..

July:
My first forth of July. Fireworks all over.
Hmm Finally mastered the Bus Route of the whole bay area of LA.
And a friend finally revealed something to me, and so prince poco's search began. (nice Bang!)

August:
I'm off to Palm Bay, Florida.
Best times. It was the most fun place i've been to in the states. I really enjoyed my stay there though it was short.
I miss tito dandan, tita au and my cousins alexis and arvin.



August 25th; going home..
only a few people knew.. coz i had to come home early.
Stayed in manila for 2 weeks..
Met up with some friends.




September:
Going home to Naga for the first time in about 6months..
I planned a surpise.. it was for kitten... it was her birthday..


Homecoming for me..
It was a fun month
get together with friends, old and new..
it was kinda like a post graduation party for me..
Parteeh!!






October:
Sembreak and wat not



Sent to Manila to review for the Boards.. (struggle) hehe
But before reviewing, roadtrip.. Pampanga muna..hehe


November:
Lie low mode.
Nothing much happened..
Started to workout again but sadly didn't worked out..hahaha
I realized something during this month.. and it was the best feeling..;)
Nov 29 and 30; wahahaha bored while taking the board..

December:
Finally found my bubble princess.
I went home to Naga just to see her.


Litz Xmas Party! One for the records. wootwoot!!!



New years eve..hehehe





Summing up, 2008 was a very good year. Sure I made some mishaps and not-so-good decisions. It was a topsy-turvy ride. I may have said things that i really didn't mean. Committed mistakes and what not. Its all part of how things came to a beautiful end.
Props to everyone who made my year, a year to remember..

shout out to dani (butterflew), jaze (tinky) and ate gleng (trolleng)! Thanks to those long talks and fun conversations. Thanks to all those cheering, corny jokes, kampihan na hindi umuubra and support. I miss you girls! Good luck in the paths we choose.. Never stop believing, and never stop dreaming.

to the "HTG" crew, namely Superman, Spiderman, The Dog and the Duckling.. Let us all continue to support the members and lets leave the past in the past. Time for change guys. No hard feelings, all but love yall..hahaha

-Superman, goodluck to wonder girl. Take care of her, i know you will.

-Spiderman, asikaso brad.. ung promise mo..

-Dog, haup ka! magpacondition ka na.. Thanks sa jaming..hehe

- Duckling, congratz.. good to have you back!

Also to my nursing tropa.. ate angie, kuya vher, tintin, tina, judith, jho, seth, kateh and dothy...
Sa mga RN, goodluck sa career. Sa mga mommy and magiging momy, yaon c mama pedeng pedia..hhaha vitamins gusto nio..hehehe Sa mga matatanda ay sa matanda pala, magayos ka na..ang mga anak mo gutom na..hahaha at sa mga katulad kong walang hilig sa nursing pero dahil sa nursing nagkakilala tau so all's good, goodluck sa atin kung saan man tau patungo..hehehe I miss you guys..

-ate angie, wahaha 23 ka na.. love you!

- kuya vher, ay kung age ang paguusapan, no comment nyahaha.. Thanks for everything bro

-tintin, salamat sa support at sa tulong.. thanks for being there. lab u ermana!

- tina, ling ling q.. thanks for being an inspiration for me this year..and i know you will still be my inspiration. Keep rockin gurl..u know im always proud of you.. missin you always.. love you so...

-mommy dudith, miss na kita... miss ka na namin.. goodluck sa lahat.. yey! grad parteeh!!

-jho, ninong and ninang kami.... congratz and miss ka na rin namin.. get together..woohoo...ingats!

-seth, kung nasan ka man, miss ka na namin.. keep jaming to the rhasta groove.. tagapailing..wahaha

-kateh, salamat sa jaraming.. mabuti ka pa kahit nasa legaspi, u seem to find time for us.. thanks sa lahat... invited dapat kami sa kasal..hahaha miss you kulet!




And of course, i'd like to thank my family( including cousins and relatives) for all their support. With out them, my year wouldn't turn out to be this way. I love you all!! I'm a certified mama's boy.. so are my bros..hehehe


And to MANOY JESS..i may have been naughty and nice,but still I know you know that my faith is in you.. BIL3x... I leave my future in your hands... wherever where you want me to be.. basta ikaw Lord..




THANKS 2008. YOU'VE BEEN GREAT

BUT 09 IS MY TIME..HEHEHE SEE YAH!

DOUBLE DOUBLE

It was a good feeling..

For the first time in months I had a chance to relive the past. After all the injuries, i constantly told myself that I wouldn't be able to rock the ball. It was a painful fate but I had accepted it, however the calling was too much..

After a dozen of sessions of rehab, I tried to make a comeback. But I knew I was out of shape, and out of breath.. Loss after loss, I reminded myself that I wasn't the player I used to be.. Unfortunately, with each loss, it was like punch after punch; hitting directly at my weakened confidence.. Each blow was like a persistent echo, telling me that this sport is not for me..

All banged up, guts bulging out and a sore ankle, I had to find my resolve. It was the final test, if it was meant to be..
So I stepped on the hardcourt thinking that this would be my last if ever i lose.

It was my battleground. A different field of battle; far more physical, far more serious than what I was used to back home. It was a nostalgic feeling; seeing opponents matched with your strength, size and then some.. A fast phase where no wimps need to apply. I relish the challenge - bumps after bumps, hard cuts and elbows everywhere.
After just a few minutes, I was having a hard time and then I was exhausted as hell but I knew I still had it in me..
So for one last hurdle, I commanded every strength in me and went on.
It was so much fun. Lady luck was shining on me for she blessed me with skilled teammates.
They somehow brought back the old me.
After taking the lead, we never held back.
I was battling for rebounds, defending and scoring..
It was really a great feeling..
10 and 10 is a good start, right?
Its a sign...
I will fly again..

LOVE OR HATE?!!!

it sucks sometimes when everything starts to be so complacent... like every speck of existing matter slows down and though you try to rush and move as fast as you can, you're trapped in a space-time continuum where memories of your downfall are played back over and over again. No, it isn't purgatory or hell 'coz you still get to experience a frequent dose of bliss every now and then. i don't want to use the word "bored", that's too typical... it undermines the things i am fond of but in a way it still epitomizes what's left in between.. Yes, i got only a few months left before the big day and you might be wondering that i must have so many things to do and finish so how in the world am i still bored?!.. yup, you're mostly right but still those things are only superficial and it won't take a genius to accomplish them. To tell you the truth, i ain't too hyped up about them anyway... like i said a million times, it ain't easy to love such nonsense.. well at least for me. i consider this course bogus.. after all, since the ghettgo, this was not my preference of choice. This is a profession that i do not hate but i despise due to the fact that so many are blinded with the false assurance of fame and money. i hate schools who use this course as a means to commercialize their institutions only then to tell half of the student body that they do not have the capacity to be promoted to the next level. And these gullible students, because of the false lure, just transfer to another school and continue where they left off. Then they graduate sparingly and now find themselves kneeling in some place, praying that they would pass the board exams. I mean seriously guys out of 100,000 students, how many would you think would instantly or at least be directed to the jackpot.. The promise of working abroad ain't too far from reality but this wolf in a sheep's clothing may offer less or more than you ever expected. If you believe that by just graduating and passing the board either locally or internationally would give you a fighting chance in the coldness and harshness of the real world, then you must rethink ever step you are taking now; try to accurately recall all the details and scrutinize everything so as you would leave no room for error.. i know you know that this road would not be easy but still why are there still so many who are willing to sacrifice blood and money just so they could try their luck. This isn't Russian roulette where you spin and pray you get your number right. This isn't poker where you could bluff your way and pretend that you're passing this course and eventually graduate or just fold when all of your cards are down.. Let me remind you that still this is survival of the fittest because only the crème de la crème would get the spot they eagerly fought for.. Mind you im not downplaying those people who really have the heart to be a nurse and the people who i see have a potential to be one too, its just that some individuals must be reminded that if this is not your cup of tea, you should ponder to yourself where would you be in the very near future or at least strive harder so as you would deserve to be here. i maybe criticized because of writing this, well, i say it to you now, though i may show a hint of interest in this route, don't ever judge me that Iam not doing my best because in all honesty, i'm not. What you may have witness before is just a shadow of a persona you may not be able to see.. This heart of mine has no warmth for this profession. my mind is the only thing that moves due to the fact that it is always my innate orientation; never to let up.. For me, i choose to just finish this course and then pick my destiny. i am proud to be wearing the white but i do not dream of wearing it as i grow old. Some say i'm just wasting my time and my potential, i say it's never i waste when you learn things along the way. I will choose my own path to tread, i will make my own fame and i will get to decide what to put into my name..

Now if you were me, would you pick a different path?

Written on : July 6, 2007 at 6:23 am

my heroine

Gather up all the friendship cliches in the world and you end up with something like this.

No it's not a bad thing. To tell you the truth, it is a beautiful reality.

There are moments in one's life that you meet people that instantly you know they're for real; that you don't really have to stay with them for a long time to get to know who they are. And these persons though you didn't get a chance to really hang out, you feel that you've known them for ages. This kind of individuals are very rare and once you meet them they are truly worth keeping. With them, things are easy. No pretenses, no repercussions and no subjugations, you can be who you really are and you don't have to front.

It can't be helped that sometimes people close to you doesn't seem to understand you at all. People you've known for ages would easily turn their back because they find it accommodating than to lend you a hand. Yes, these people are still your friends and will be, however this is a reality that besets every person. They have their own drama to play and certainly they have enough troubles in their lives. Sometimes the world is a big irony; whenever you're down and friends you expect to be there, truly are not. White lies and all those crap comes into play.

Like I always say, "Hell may freeze over but true friends will stay always by your side." True, some will stick it out with you, and most will just fade in the distance.
Then there would be these special persons you didn't expect that would come knocking on your door and break it down if they have to just to make sure that every thing's alright. These unique individuals seem to be at the right place at your most undesirable time. Lending a hand, tapping your back or just plainly being with you,empathizing without speaking... bearing without the need of knowing.

My armor is all dented. It almost has served its purpose. I was sent into a foreign land to fight an unknown opponent. This shroud that I wear is all torn up and I am ready to remove it.
I may become vulnerable but luckily I still have my friends (my crew) and family as my sword and shield.

What keeps me going is these persons ( you know who you are )

They are my heroine, my addiction and my adrenaline.

They introduce insanity to keep me sane.

They give me rush when I'm almost out of gas.

Without them knowing, they made me who I am today.

And without them, Neverland would cease to exist.

Now, if the need for me to return to battle, I am ready.
I am ready to go back for I know they will also be there with me.

An addiction that is worthwhile. A vice that is a virtue..

My heroine... Thanks for everything...

The BATMOBILE - the lancer gt

"TAhntahntahntahn" - Batman opening song...

It isn't exactly the big ass bat mobile that Christian Bale used in the Dark Knight but it will hold its own against that bulky piece of wheel.

Introducing the 2008 Mitsubishi Lancer Ex, the dark horse or whatever you may call it...
It has almost the same looks as its big brother, the EVO X. Though not the same engine setup, it is pretty fast. With a 2.0 MIVEC engine, how macho can it be?!

My cousin bought a new one a couple of days ago and man, is it pleasing to the eyes. The more you look at it, the more menacing it looks. Imagine a sedan being stripped of its Sunday church clothes and beefing up into a sporty and shark-like appearance.

Anywhere you go, people can't help but look at the car. Its like being an instant celebrity when you're riding one.. People will say "ang gwapo naman ( how handsome it is)," so the tendency would be anyone who's riding it will automatically become momentarily famous. (hahaha)


Every part of the car exudes audacity in an elegant and subtle way. From the 18'' rims to the sporty seats, its like an average person's sports car. Though gas prices isn't to be laugh at nowadays, but this car screams off speed and more speed.

My cousin has really gone a long way to get this on. A bat mobile that be fits its name. All he needs now is a cape.

But the need for speed is out of the question.
All there is left to do is to ride it again.
and maybe just maybe, I can yell...

"how you like them apples!"

"We can rebuild him... better..stronger...faster..."

Now I may not be the Six million dollar man but in a sense "we have the technology"...

I am Nathan Santiago (of course, not my real name) 6ft something, 200 something and a whole lot of everything.
For those of you who know me, I was always a chubby fella.. but the only down side is that I'm fragile as a glass. Its been almost 3 years now, since I started to lose and gain weight. I have tried every diet you could thing of; low carb, low fat and etc. I have also become a gym rat where I would always pick gym back then over some booze or party.
But trying to be fit is not an easy job especially when you have an imaginary tag saying injury prone. It's a commitment and a lifestyle that one must follow for the rest of his mediocre life.
At the start, the reason why i wanted to lose weight was because I wanted to look different. I had a self-confidence of a peacock. And it was so low that I even avoided talking to my crush (silly me.hahaha)
so back then I decided to change to show people a different side of me.. ENNNGk, wrong move, my planned failed.
Later on, I finally realized something; that if you want to change, do it for yourself not for others.
then after that, everything fell into place and I was doing better.
I have reached my goals a dozen time already. In one way or the other, I have achieved only a few "belly off warriors" have attained. But due to some twisted strike of fate, those success would always be accompanied by sheer bad luck.
I think I've spent more time in rehab (uhh, no not the one that drug abusers go to) than a normal old person would ever.
It has been really annoying, every time I reach my full potential whether its physically or athletically, i would always seem to end up in a clinic. Partly it's my fault, being wreckless and all.. Being blinded by a foolish fact that we are only young once..
I used to say, " Before, I can rock the rim, now the only thing I can rock is my bed..."

Man, this yo-yo effect is getting pretty old. I'm in rehab again and finally I'm getting better..
Yesterday, I started working out again.. but not my usual weight or rep range.
It feels good. I have my ecstasy again..
But now I'm gonna take it easy unlike the old days.. I'll try to be more careful and stop being hard headed.. I do want to see my own grand kids some day.. so this is the perfect opportunity to change..

PROJECT: NATHAN has commenced.. If you want to be part of it then enlist up..haha
By December, hopefully, no not hopefully but surely...
I'd feel like a million bucks...
so stay tuned..

the bubble princess

A light year away, she used to be as precious as a flower. It was all an affable dream. Nobody knew everything would end up this way..
for some time now, a fragile person resided in the shadow of things..
I have yet to encounter another person which such frailty yet embossed with a craggy exterior..

One night, while i was searching in the mystic forest, i slipped and got knocked down off my feet. Still dizzy and disoriented, i manage to see a figure ahead.. She was smiling..

"Have you seen my kitten? Mister Clumsy Man," a small voice resounded

"I am no clumsy man, and what is a little girl doing in a big scary forest?" i uttered in reply

"I am no little girl either" she answered back, "I am a princess"

I was curios. I couldn't see her face so I went forward to get a glimpse. But as I was almost near, a soft jelly like barrier obstructed me..

"You see kind sir, I am the bubble princess, no one can come near me if they please to.. but i cant also get close to anybody.."

"But you said you have a kitten" I hesitatingly queried

"Yes I do," with a grin on her face, " I allow her to get near me. But she got lost while running after a squirrel"


"Why can't you find her then?"


"It's dark and I'm afraid to go outside of my bubble.. would you help me look for her?' she requested.


"hmm.. I'm kinda looking for something too.. "


" Ohh please please kind sir, she's my only friend. I promise I'd give you something in return" she wittingly muttered.




" then you need to hold my hand"


there was a popping sound. Then everything went black..

my alarm clock was ringing. i woke up and beside my bed was a bubble half settled on the floor..

helter-skelter

ART WORK BY ME

Ever had the feeling of standing still... Like running on quicksand, no matter how hard you run you couldn't get out.. Ever had the feeling of always wearing a mask... playing a charade as to make people believe that you're doing alright; that everything is good.. Sometimes the saying is right; its much easier to wear a smile than explaining to people.. its way better than making them understand...
This sucks.. its like being torn into three different persons, each with a need to make a decision.. i hate this.. i hate feeling vulnerable,feeling clueless and confused... i don't wanna say i'm afraid.. i don't want to pretend that im satisfied.. Sh*t! i sound like a loser.. always whining..always complaining... Afraid? afraid of what? afraid of who? I'm suppose to be afraid of growing up or afraid of the future..
damn it.. yeah im scared.. so what..who wouldn't be.. but im scared for a different reason.."I'm scared of what i won't become" Yeah, nice job kit! there you go again.. Sure, blame it again on the f'ing profession.. it was and still is always your scapegoat.. telling everybody that it wasn't your fault, that it wasn't you who dug yourself into this hole you're cowering in...

Practicality.. huh? what a word.. What a stupid and imprudent word. Does everything really revolve around money.. I mean why do we have to be chained in a reality where everyone of us embarks into a journey in search of more loot.. Can we just be happy and contented with simple things? hay i wish i can learn that too... "Think of this way, almost a million people wants to be in your place?"... the hell! I'd gladly give it up if their simple joy is just to earn the green dough... Whatever happened to being who you are and making your own destiny? Whatever happened to picking your own destiny; spinning the wheel of fate and paving your own road? Guess it was all BULL.. no matter how much effort you put into, at the end of the day, society will always judge you on how fat your pockets are.. yep, its only the financially fortunate ones who gets a say in the real world.. I maybe wrong, but unless someone proves me otherwise.. my claim still stands..

Funny, i remember telling my dad, that I'd do any work when im up here.. I guess I didn't elaborate enough that the work I mentioned should be non-nursing related... My first months here I'd accept care-giving jobs in no less than a heartbeat. It was cool, earning a hundred bucks a day even if it wasn't regular. Yeah like I'd do weekends or two and it was alright. But something in me i knew wasn't happy.. Later i realized that me being here was all a big misunderstanding, that and the hysterical speculations of my relatives. It was an inadvertent accident where I chose a ticket away from facing a false certainty. Don't get me wrong.. im grateful for being here. I'm thankful to all my relatives who made this possible.. I'm really thankful that i had the chance to experience a different surrounding and experience life in the U.S. of A.. NCLEX.. what a big joke.. the only reason why i did apply for it was i dont wanna disappoint my mom.. All of them are saying Nursing is the way.. that its the only ticket to the American Dream or at least something like that.. Now I wouldn't really disagree on that since many did reach it. However it's not just me. I never was a great follower, i was better in being a trend setter.


But DAMN it! I'm my own worst enemy. I know what I want but I'm too indecisive to get it.. its like even if i decide on something, i still end up being confused. Like now, i've decided to avoid anything related to nursing. so i'm even refusing caregiving jobs that pays decent... i dunno really why im avoiding it eventhough i have nothng else better to do.. Hay, the nclex part is also another issue.. I mean it's not really the case if i can handle it or not. Coz believe me, i know i can handle it well..the only thing is it's like going on stage and ready to sing a piece then only to find out that you were supposed to play the piano.. Do you get what I mean? Then there's the case of me leaning towards Med School.. Also there's the thing about venturing out and branching into another field.. I don't want to go there anymore coz clearly im confused as it is and it'll be too long and too tiring to discuss.. Heart.... Money.... Goal... Future..



Damn.. Sometimes it suck to be me... There's too much going on in my head that at the end of the day, it seems nothing had happened and the day is laid to waste. I'm always stuck in my head and i fell like i'll never leave that place... I thought i was focused but im not yet prepared... Ughh What the hell is wrong with me? Can somebody help.. For the past weeks, it has always been like this.. I hope I'll find the answer soon. The only thing i have decided was that i need to decide what and where i need to place myself.. still soul searching... still confused still.... still..... (clock ticking) Is there something you can say?

broom..broom

Sometimes we're so engrossed in our own eccentric lives that we forget the meaning of simplest things..

I have been traveling a lot lately and by a lot, I really mean exhausting, back and forth journey under the heat of the summer sun..
I'm not complaining of anything and believe me it has been fun...
Just then I realized that a "bus ride" is exactly like my life..
To start of things, you know when I always say i don't want to be just standing still and being stagnant and all that...It was rather an understatement...
I learned so many things about myself recently.
Like for instance, that I have an insurmountable patience when it comes to things I fairly understand but i have little restraint for informations repeated to me over and over...
Also I have an unwittingly ridiculous audacity but I mellow down whenever a particular situation faces me..
And for a big fluffy guy like me, its amazing how i can be invisible to others...

So going back..lately I realized that the whole bus ride can be really comparable to my somewhat prosaic existence..
From the searching for the right bus route to the destination itself, every step is like a representation of my own actuality..

Let's begin with the searching for the bus route. In all essence, it's just like college.. I knew where I had to go but I didn't know how to get there.. Options are laid out to you but you can't seem figure out the right one. So I ended up in the shortest and maybe easiest route..
Now you might ask, what's wrong with that one.. Think of it this way, if that bus route would be the shortest then it could only mean that people know of it and you just end up all crammed in a little old overused bus.

Then there's the bus stop, where you wait and wait and wait and sometimes wonder if the bus will ever come.. Funny thing about bus stops are they're like set backs..minor discrepancies that we face.. Whether its a loss of something or an inevitable circumstances, they always make us stand still and wait for the best. The only good side to them is they make you think. Even for a moment, they help you gather up your thoughts and finally decide in a number of possibilities such as am I on the right bus stop, should i take another bus stop, should i get on the first bus or wait for the other, and is this really the right bus? do you get what i mean..

So by the time the bus arrives you're ready or at least you think you are...
Once you get on the bus, it's a whole new level... It's somewhat strange.. you know when you get on the bus, you kinda hesitate and think., now where would I go, to the back of the bus or just stay in front, should i sit or just stand in the middle..
It makes you think..it's somewhat like being in the outside world.. should one really shine and show his/her potentials and abilities, should one be on center stage or be behind the scenes and blend in the crowd..
Then there's the different people you meet.. some are good, some are less desirable and some are just plain crazy.. some would offer small talk.. others would just prefer to be left alone.. During the ride , you see different characters much like in real life, each one of them from the bus driver to the last person at the back, they all seem to resemble a specific person in your life..


Then the ride itself.. Depending on how far and how heavy the traffic is, you absolutely have no idea what time you'll arrive at any given place.. The good thing is the road often traveled is not that bumpy.. so no matter how long the ride is, you have time to relax and rethink as to where you're destination truly is. (kinda like me being here..)
Keep note; though in paper you know where you're going but the truth is you have never been there before. So you eagerly and anxiously inspect each sign in order not to get lost..
Each bus and bus ride is different and unique in the sense that no two bus are exactly alike. Like a bus can be ancient old and another can be as classy and techy as it can get..
Thus, every time you ride a bus, it's an epic adventure waiting to happen..

Yeah, it 's really pretty nice when you get the hang of things..
Remember above when i said i don't like standing still..
Well.. I don't know if it is a problem.. But i noticed if I'm in motion again, I just can't stop moving...
Being grounded is not in my dictionary.. so i tend to go places.. Call it indecisive or call it adventurous.. call it whatever you want.. I just like to go around and test new ways to go about..
Sometimes I ride this bus, i take this bus route and so on and so forth but when i get a little bit crazy, i get side tracked and explore another area or route..
Maybe it's just me.. From Point A to Point B, there's no straight line for me.. I mean where's the fun in that.. it's always good to be side tracked a bit and experience new things .. But the destination should always be in your mind..

Like i said it was and still has been fun for me.. I relish every moment I have been here.. Though my destination is a lil shady..I am enjoying the ride as it is..
And everyday is a learning experience, every bus is an unwritten story..
I wish i could still ride them for a long time...
I'm not ready yet though...
I'm not ready to pull the string that says "STOP"

no goodbyes

In a span of one’s life, a person would meet a unique entity; an individual who could only exist in an egotistical reverie…
There is always a fine line between immaturity and plain insensitivity..
there is a big difference between destiny and coincidence.. Whereas the latter hails from a more perplexed reality..
Naivitie, before, has been a scapegoat to the angst of disappointment but then again it served as a stepping stone in order to witness a different change..
I am proud to share that i have, in one way or another, experienced such oppurtunity - to get to know a person who exudes a certain irony,an undecerned mystery, an affable insurgence..
Her name, behind a gleeful exterior, is known by many as someone dependable..(though she says the opposite)
An admiration of respect is best shown by the way she acts, talks and brings herself…
Funny, how sometimes she would eagerly argue things that should or would stand out….
Her aura seems to be intoxicatingly eloquent.. she is as decietful as a butterfly yet her charm gets the best of her…
Reminiscing back at the old days, i could still vividly remember how dumbfounded i was.. yes, we were young and i was childish.. I regret that i never saw the oppurtinity that would eventually lead to a more meaningful friendship.. But it wasnt all that bad, for one thing, i saw something in her, a hint or a clue, you might say, that would tell you that she’d be a unique blend; more than a total package…
Her story is like no other…
She was always head strong; a damsel who did not need the grace of promiscuity or even the shared hype of popularity just so she could seek happiness…
I’d always admire her from afar… I dont know what but she has always this "thing" that when she smiles, moves or acts, she exudes an unrivaled confidence beyond her age… and that confidence seems to calm me… it makes me assured that this girl would go far; that she would be standing out in the real world…
She is a princess to me.. a royalty shrouded with humility…
Although I may not necessarily be her prince charming but i will definitely always be her gummy, her knight in not-so-shining armor.. (wink2x)
Her love and her passion is incomparable… When she gives it, she gives it selflessly.. I envy her for such devotion… her careful heart seems to be the holy grail that guys might seek in a lifetime… Yet i am still troubled as to why someone could hurt such precious jewel…
I have witnessed her pain, heartaches and denials..
Yet her matured heart always picks her up and helps her stand with her head high and eyes open…
I smile at the thought that she had finally (well almost) learned
True indeed, one would learn, after awhile, the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul..
She, in more ways than one, has been there for me..
Her presence would bring a special kind of relief; a soothing effect to my everyday burden
She epitomizes what a true friend truly is - When she says she going to be by your side, she is going to be there…
I love her company not only because she’s an angel to be with but there would always be a quirky way in which things would end up… From the never-ending trivias to the promises and deals; each of them is a treasure worth keeping for a lifetime…
She has this uncanny aptitude when she talks, you would seem to go into a deep trance and end up listening to her so intently…

I cherish that i have come to know such person, a bestfriend (if there’s a category beyond that she’d fit perfectly) and my princess..
I wish to cite a million things here…But then again i know i’d be just missing her a million more..

I hate this… i hate the fact that we are growing up so fast…
That pretty soon, one of us would eventually leave.. (sigh =C)
That i would not anymore see her walk the stage and become a lady in completion

I am thankful though..
Thankful in the sense that even for a short period of time, we were able to spend time together
we got to laugh, cry and pour our hearts out.. That we were able to enjoy things and be contented with simple stuffs..

Im proud of her really.. I know for sure that she’d do well; that she’s going to make her plans a reality…
I keep telling myself, she’s going to be great..With her beauty, wits and charm, nobody can stop her…

And after everything has been said and done, i wish i would meet her again.. i would see her living her dream… That’s the time i’ll know, that i was right..
When that day comes, i hope she would still be the girl who inspired me… the lady who was there for me.. the reason for my smile…

Smile princess.. Keep smiling, for me..

Created: March 3rd, 2008